Monday, December 10, 2007

The State of things

Hello again

I was reading the web news this morning and came across yet another truly disturbing story about a young kid with a gun shooting up innocents in a parking lot of a Christian Youth facility out in Arvada (another of my old stomping grounds) and then allegedly doing the same in a church in Colorado Springs. The officials are still trying to determine whether it was the same assailant. Not more than a week ago there was a 19 year old, despondent over losing both his job at McBurger world and his girlfriend, he went into a shopping mall with an assault rifle, shot up the place killing 8 innocents. I refer to them as innocents not because they were pure of heart and free from sin, but because they didn't fire on these assailants first.

Now with all of this and the gun violence I read about in schools across this country, it leads me to think of why there is such a sharp rise of violence. I have some theories and they probably aren't going to be popular, but they are my opinions and theories.

1) It goes back to the Spare the Rod, spoil the child, mentality. Is all of this violence because the parents of these kids, these assailants, these takers of youth, vibrant and innocence, afraid to spank their kids? If when they were babies or adolescences, they did something horrible like accidentally killing a cat, did they get a time out instead of a belt or a switch? I mean, does punishment at the level of a spanking keep these soon to be killers from turning down that road? Or is like the old adage, violence begets violence? I'm in no way condoning beating a child, but in my mind there is a difference between a spanking and a beating. I know that there are a couple of people who will disagree with me until the day they die, and that's alright, I've been lucky enough to have only had to spank MG 3 times in her entire lifetime. 1 swat with my hand on her bottom, 3 times in her entire lifetime. And truly it hurt me more than it hurt her, and on the other side of the coin, I know parents who have kids who run rampant in their own home, the parents count to 3 as if they are going to put the child into time out or in their room without and then they do nothing except count to 3 again. I've heard these children tell their parents that they hate them and that if they ever laid a hand on them, they'd call CPS and have them tossed in jail, these kids were 8 and 6. If I tried that at 8 or 6, my parents would hand me the phone and tell me to call CPS, just to call my bluff, then I'd be sent to my room, butt a little redder and no dinner or dessert, but I digress... Is what we're reaping a result of sparing the rod and spoiling the children?

2) Is it an effect of over medicating the youth? I am fortunate enough to have a daughter who is extremely intelligent and mentally healthy, I take the time to talk with her to let her know that things some days will suck, but tomorrow is a new day. If she ever has an issue, she can definitely talk to me about it, and I won't judge her because I love her. I realize that there are some meds out there which are a definite benefit for their users, but is the doctors prescriptions diluting our kids to the point where their mild depressions that come with teenagedom are turning into psychotic rages which justifies, in their minds, their going out and cutting down people that they don't know? Is it a combination of being over medicated and the violence in video games and the other media?

3) Is it the lack of religion in the household? I grew up in a family of 'Recovering Catholics' as my mom would put it. We didn't go to church, because my parents had it beaten into them as children that they had to, so this was their way of rebelling as adults. I am very spiritual, and believe that you don't need to go to a place, necessarily to pray or worship. But could a lack of faith, in one's self or that things will get better or even that they may have a higher purpose, could that be causing these atrocities?

4) Are they just wanting to be copy cats and they can because it's so easy to get guns?

Or am I just trying to read too much into this and these kids are just a little messed up in the head and they have to take it out on someone? I know logically that there is no real answer, and until there is, these kids are going to continue killing innocent people in a psychotic fueled rage. I feel that it kills each of use a little each time we see something like this in the media, and I want to live longer than that.

4 comments:

mielikki said...

Wow, excellent post.
We've talked about this ourselves, so it's no great surprise to you that I agree with all of this. . .
very well said, though. AND you can balance wine bottles. Impressive. :)

Bubblewench said...

Awesome post...

"there is a difference between a spanking and a beating" part of why I don't want children. I agree with this and think it's ridiculous that parents let kids get away with so much for so little punishment. OH, I lost my Xbox privlidges for a week. Who cares, I'll play my game boy instead. Empty threats and follow through by todays parents (obviously not all of them!)

"you don't need to go to a place, necessarily to pray or worship" I'm all over the 'Recovering Catholics' as I am the one that rebelled and stopped going to church every single week and holy day. I believe I am spirital an I worship in my own way and I pray daily. There is a lack of 'spritiaul' guidance from parents these days that I believe accepts violence and bad behaviour as the normal.

I don't know all about the meds, but it seems that every single kid is on meds anymore, and while my brother had allergies and was hyperactive, today he would be ADD and medicated. He turned out alright without that. He wasn't allowed to eat chocolate, but hey, better then pumping him full of pills. And I know he sneaks the chocolate now when no one is looking.

MM said...

Thank you both. :) I think that's why I needed to change the name of the post to Brain Droppings... :)

sybil law said...

Dude.
I agree on everything. Not only is it the parents who have no control nowadays - it's the teachers, too. Teachers cannot even LOOK at someone's child the wrong way anymore. No control at home, no control at school. It's sick. I've spanked Gilda a few times - and it took a LOT to get me there, but she does not want it to happen again. Like you, it definitely hurt me more than her, but still. It got an otherwise ignored point across, which is I AM IN CHARGE and YOU WILL DO WHAT I SAY.
Lack of religion is also something that's changed and you've got to be an idiot not to put things together. Why take that out of the pledge of allegiance? I remember kids who barely said it at all or skipped that part, and it didn't freaking harm them no matter what anyone says. Every now and then I take Gilda to a non denominational church, because I want her to have that basic foundation. What is the harm in your child thinking that there is someone always looking over them, who loves them more than anything else in the world? Also there's the same rules we teach at home: be kind, you're special, love is forgiving, etc. Too many kids don't get that these days and it shows.
My friend and I always joke about how back in the day, we alll knew kids who were hyperactive and some downright nuts. They got into real trouble if they didn't learn to settle down. Now, we medicate them and it's "not really their fault".
Fucking society!
Great post.